Monday, October 13, 2008

Note to Self

Yeah, that's YOU, dummy. I know I'm just an insignificant little member to you. You don't think about me much. You don't call. You don't write. But next time you decide to reach into the dishwasher for a dirty spoon to shove leftovers down the garbage disposal with, try looking. My buddies left eye and right eye are good at multi-tasking, you can swivel them my way to avoid jabbing the tine of a filthy fork between me and my nail straight into the nail bed.
Did you know that in some places that is still used as a form of torture? It's true. I know, I'm whining. It only bled for an hour. It could've been the garbage disposal? Not likely. Middle or Index would've seen that coming and given me the head's up. So, just to make sure you don't make that mistake again, I'm going to swell and throb for the next day or so.
Don't even think about doing up those baby buttons on the back of your kid's onesies. Writing with a pen? Try it, I dare you. At least you live in the modern world and do most of your writing on a keyboard where I am not terribly overworked.
Oh, and I'll also stay red and bruised under the nail until it grows out....just so you'll know how much you hurt me. I'll probably have to go to therapy for this.

Your trusty right,


  1. Wow, you must be learning how to space with your LEFT thumb when you type.

    I've never really thought about how often my thumb has to hit that space bar, or even which one I use...until now. I space exclusively with my right thumb. after. every. word. Isn't it amazing what your hands will do automatically, and from memorization without you even thinking consciously about it?

    Hope your throb goes away soon. That sucks.

  2. Note to thumb,

    No need to worry you will be fine once the nail falls off. Of course then it is hideous to look at and very sensitive, but look at it this way, atleast you have nine other fingers to help you do your bidding.

    As a side note, be grateful you don't have to wear shoes that every time you step rub against the "nail-less" section.

    May your nail fall off soon,
    Melissa's big toe.

  3. Natalie's thumb: so sorry about your injury!!!